IMPALA-12860: Invoke validateDataFilesExist for RowDelta operations

We must invoke validateDataFilesExist for RowDelta operations (DELETE/
UPDATE/MERGE). Without this a concurrent RewriteFiles (compaction) and
RowDelta can corrupt a table.

IcebergBufferedDeleteSink now also collects the filenames of the data
files that are referenced in the position delete files. It adds them to
the DML exec state which is then collected by the Coordinator. The
Coordinator passes the file paths to CatalogD which executes Iceberg's
RowDelta operation and now invokes validateDataFilesExist() with the
file paths. Additionally it also invokes validateDeletedFiles().

This patch set also resolves IMPALA-12640 which is about replacing
IcebergDeleteSink with IcebergBufferedDeleteSink, as from now on
we use the buffered version for all DML operations that write
position delete files.

Testing:
 * adds new stress test with DELETE + UPDATE + OPTIMIZE

Change-Id: I4869eb863ff0afe8f691ccf2fd681a92d36b405c
Reviewed-on: http://gerrit.cloudera.org:8080/21099
Tested-by: Impala Public Jenkins <impala-public-jenkins@cloudera.com>
Reviewed-by: Gabor Kaszab <gaborkaszab@cloudera.com>

common/protobuf/control_service.proto

@@ -109,6 +109,10 @@ message DmlExecStatusPB {
   // root's key in an unpartitioned table being ROOT_PARTITION_KEY.
   // The target table name is recorded in the corresponding TQueryExecRequest
   map<string, DmlPartitionStatusPB> per_partition_status = 1;
+
+  // In case of Iceberg modify statements it contains the data files referenced
+  // by position delete records.
+  repeated string data_files_referenced_by_position_deletes = 2;
 }
 
 // Error message exchange format